My sister Kathyrn Edith was born 24 May 1952. She was born with Rh Disease and not expected to live very long. My Mom went against the doctor's advice to put her in an institution and brought Kathyrn home.
Mom and Kathy 1953
(shortly before she died)
I had a little sister for just over 10 months. Kathyrn died 4 April 1953. My mother was devastated. She took my brother and I to my grandmother's house and told my father to get rid of everything baby-related before we got home. Dad looked after the burial arrangements and I never heard anything more about Kathyrn, except two times much later in life. It was a tacit agreement in the house that she was never spoken of.
I was young so I didn't really understand it all at the time, I just knew Kathyrn was gone and she wasn't coming back. There were many times in my life that I felt the void, especially when I saw sisters together that were close. I was robbed of that. Visiting graves was not something our family did, the relatives that I knew were all cremated, so I never thought about a gravesite for Kathyrn. Until....
My father died in 2013 and I was the executor of his estate. I put all important papers in a big envelope and brought them home to go over. The envelope sat for a long time before I decided to go through it. Among his papers I discovered a burial certificate for Kathyrn.
She was buried!! And I had the name of the cemetery. And I had a friend that lived not too far from that cemetery. And coincidentally, her name is Cathern.
I got in touch with Cathern and asked her if she lived close to the Lakeview Cemetery and if perhaps she could find the gravesite. She told me her grandparents were buried there and she would like to go and find their grave also. So on a fine day in August 2014 Cathern went to Lakeview Cemetery, and in a dingy, messy office she met with an employee who found the names in the computer. But the employee didn't know were the plot for Kathyrn was, although they did eventually find her grandparents. She left her name and number for the manager who would know where to find Plot 2, Lot I,Section D.
Two months later the manager called Cathern and told her he found where my sister Kathyrn was buried over 61 years ago. He said there was no marker but he could show her where the plot is. She is buried in an area with other children. On one side are two children from the same family, a baby and a 4 year old, and on her other side is an older child.
On November 11, 2014, Cathern left flowers on her grave and took a photo for me. It was a very emotional day for me when I received this photo, and I am forever grateful to Cathern for finding my sister, Kathyrn.
Very sad to lose a sister at any age but particularly such a young girl. Teary feeling when I read that you finally know where Kathryn is resting in peace.
ReplyDeleteThanks Marian. I was more emotional than I expected to be. And, I did tell my Mom before she died so she could rest easy about it.
DeleteAlways sad to confront infant deaths. My Mother and Father's first child was a daughter who died at 5 months. As was the custom of the time, my sister was buried in an unmarked grave in La Salle Cemetery. My brothers and I had a grave marker made and installed.
ReplyDeleteI wrote a blog post about it at https://hoguegirardin.wordpress.com/2015/09/28/my-sister-lorraine-part-2/
It is wonderful you have photos of your sister. And yes, I love the shoes!
DeleteMy Mom's cousin lost a baby, and now she has memorial stones in her garden... one for the baby, one for her husband of just shy of 70 years, and one for her grandson tragically killed as a youth. I like that idea too.
Dianne, What a lovely post. I was very pleased that I could help you find Kathyrn grave and will go visit whenever I visit my grandparents.
ReplyDeleteOne of my mother's sisters died when she was five and although she is buried with her grandparents, (and was moved when they were before the Seaway opened), there is nothing on the stone for Ivy.
Thinking possibly a memorial stone could be placed at the foot of the headstone...
One day when I come back east I will call you and we can go together. I'd like that. I am forever grateful for your kindness Cathern.
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